This essay topic was seen in recent IELTS test in Romania.
Research has shown that the transportation of products and people is the main source of pollution. Some people believe the government should be in charge of this, while others believe it is the fault of individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The increasing problem of pollution, primarily from the transportation of goods and individuals, raises the question of whether the government or the public should be responsible for addressing this issue. In my opinion, both the government and individuals play crucial roles in tackling this issue.
Supporters of government intervention argue that pollution, being a large-scale issue, requires comprehensive and wide-ranging solutions that are beyond the scope of individual capabilities. Governments have the power to enforce laws like stringent emission standards for vehicles, which can significantly influence both corporate and personal behaviors. Furthermore, state investment in sustainable public transportation systems can promote a shift towards environmentally friendly travel. For example, similar government policies in Sweden have successfully reduced transportation pollution, proving how impactful government action can be.
On the other hand, many believe individual actions are the key to solving the issue of pollution. Our personal transport choices greatly affect pollution levels, and if more people chose the eco-friendly options like carpooling, cycling, or public transport over their private vehicles, there would be a significant reduction in pollution levels. It is also equally important for the public to show support for policies and technologies aimed at reducing transport emissions. Advocating for and adopting cleaner technologies, such as electric vehicles, and supporting government policies that encourage sustainable practices, can also lead to substantial reductions in pollution.
While both perspectives are valid, I believe that an integrated approach is essential. Governments can create policies and infrastructure for major change, but individual choices are just as important in supporting these efforts. Both entities must work together for effective pollution control.
Teacher’s feedback:
Overall, this essay would likely achieve a Band 8.
Task Response: Band 8
The essay addresses the task fully, presenting a clear opinion and discussing both views comprehensively. Each viewpoint is supported by relevant examples, such as the reference to Sweden’s policies. The conclusion effectively summarises the essay by reiterating the need for an integrated approach.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 8
The essay is well-organised and logically structured. Ideas are clearly laid out and easy to follow. Cohesive devices are used effectively, such as “On the other hand” and “Furthermore.” The conclusion ties back to the introduction, enhancing the overall coherence.
Lexical Resource: Band 8
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary appropriately and accurately. Terms like “comprehensive,” “sustainable public transportation systems,” and “integrated approach” demonstrate a strong command of language. The vocabulary is used precisely, enhancing the clarity of the argument.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 8
The essay demonstrates a wide range of complex structures with high accuracy. Examples include: “Governments have the power to enforce laws like stringent emission standards for vehicles, which can significantly influence both corporate and personal behaviors.” The grammatical accuracy is consistently high, contributing to the clarity and sophistication of the essay.
Submit your essay for correction and find out how to improve your Writing score.
Click here to see more IELTS essays of Band 8
The post IELTS essay, topic: Transportation of products and people is the main source of pollution (discuss + opinion) first appeared on IELTS-Blog.
https://ift.tt/u3ackHh
from IELTS-Blog https://ift.tt/D7f4EhZ
via IFTTT
No comments:
Post a Comment